For a long time I have a strong desire to lose weight and change the shape of my body.
Of course I am way too over weight. Being overweight does not affect my life in a negative way. But it doesn’t make me happy either.
Changing body shape is no doubt a difficult task. It becomes even more difficult rather impossible for me because
I AM A PERFECTIONIST: I am always waiting for the perfect time & the perfect diet plan as if I am certain of what will come my way tomorrow. This also includes my all or nothing approach towards losing fat. I have a noble prize in perfectionism which leads to another problem that makes me a super procrastinator.
I PROCRASTINATE: When People tell me my weight really suits me or sits well on my body,there is no need for you to lose weight.I reason with them thinking they are right! I tell myself losing weight is not really difficult, but I don’t feel like starting losing weight just yet. I leave it for tomorrow. I’ll do it later. I’ll start from next Monday, next month, after my niece birthday. After exams, after best friend’s wedding. There is no guarantee that I’ll be organized and disciplined tomorrow. And that tomorrow never comes.
EXCUSES: I find many excuses to not to lose weight. For instance Excuse No1, curves are sexier than skinny YEA RIGHT so how sexier are painful knees than .Excuse No2, I don’t want to be skinny, the inner voice says you don’t need to be skinny just be fit, be svelte and healthy. Excuse No3, Men love something to grab or to hold, Hmmmm this may be true but in real life how many men we see holding a Somu wrestler look alike? (No offense I am being sarcastic to myself, though I do not look like a Somu:)
I AM NOT 100% COMMITTED:I am always making plans for weight loss but not implementing any of them. I never stick to any calorie deficit program and exercise routine for long. Talk about half hearted efforts. To achieve something great I have to sacrifice. Weight loss=changing body shape=health is sheer discipline… period. I have never changed a thing in my life style. Except changing restaurants and takeaways.
I AM AN EMOTIONAL EATER: I eat with my emotions on the driving seat. I eat when I am sad, angry, bored, depressed, stressed and lonely; I have made friends with food. The site of my favorite food at home or going out to nice places to eat gives me pleasure. I have stopped finding joy and pleasure in other things in life.
IT’S NOT MY FAULT THAT I AM FAT:I blame everything and everyone for my obesity i.e. genes, slow metabolism, not enough time, my food loving friends, the cat, the tree ,the cookie etc etc. I really let myself go at my heaviest weight today but not taking full responsibility for it, i.e. that it is me and only me who brought me to this size.
I AM FAR TOO UNGRATEFUL: I do not respect my body by not taking care of it. My Body that is to be treated as a temple for my soul to reside is used as fat storage go down.
SCARY SIDE EFFECTS: Every time I try to make some changes my mind starts playing a horror scene in future. It is difficult to admit but yes my main fear of losing so much weight and changing my body shape is the fear of getting all the side effects that may come with weight loss i.e. Lines and wrinkles, loose skin, cellulites, stretch marks, saggy boobs, small butt, etc etc. I love the size of my assets Is it worth taking the risk of losing the size of them? I really love my younger looking, smooth skin, too well for my age. I don’t want to lose the freshness and youthfulness of my face.
After brutally scanning the excuses and fears I came to a conclusion that all the perfectionism, procrastination and excuses are different forms of fear of change.
We are so resistance to Change because change brings unknown fears. Change is scary, horrible, annoying frustrating, change makes our hearts sink. Change is uncomfortable, unpleasant, risky and unpredictable. Change brings Fear of failure, fear of success. Right?
But don’t we get use to a change if there is no way out? I think only unplanned, unexpected change is scary.
Fear resides in mind. It’s the mind that prevents me from changes.
There is a history of many failed attempts achieving this goal on my own. Therefore I decided to go public, and challenge myself .My mind started throwing fears and doubts ,what if I failed to achieve my goal, what if I end up with a red face in front of my readers so it’s better I do not make it public.
But I am ignoring it by seeking support of like minded people online and having fun while achieving my goal. I will find buddies and we can achieve goals together.
I don’t want to live a mediocre life with fears and regrets of not doing something amazing.
If Ye Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear!
Mind is a muscle that can be trained. The negative data can be replaced with the new and positive data. Every time we try to change any established pattern of behavior or try to do something new. It makes us feel uncomfortable both on emotional and physical level. To keep us safe, like a magnet it pulls us back in our comfort zones. But if we convince the mind that this change will bring, health, wealth happiness etc. It will become a great partner in success.
Replacing fear with hope, faith, peace and love.
Change is human nature.It trigger opportunities, progress, and possibilities, Change can be a wonderful thing if it is planned. It brings excitement and colours in life.
I am Switching excuses and procrastination with ACTIONS WITH PASSION.
My Change is going to be beautiful, it’s going to be sexy, and it’s going to be passionate. It’s going to be wonderful; it’s going to be fabulous, because my change is coming from a place of love not fear.
Conclusion and determinations
I will never be ready. So I rather do it 180°c because there will never be a perfect time, there will never be a perfect formula. The words Losing weight or going on a diet are too generic, too boring. I do not feel any butterflies in my tummy.
I am starting to design my body from now. Now is the only fact. Whatever is available in now I am going to utilize it and see how I make progress in 2-4-8-12-24-36- 48 and 52 weeks. This time when I am thinking of changing and designing my body I feel a river of joy flowing within my body. I know I will make it happen. I am getting bundles of dopamine, endorphins, and serotonin and god knows how many more happy chemical reactions in my body.
I feel ecstasy and excitement just thinking about my new body.
And as I set my life on fire for this change I am seeking the support of those who can fan my flames.
This is one more blog in the world. Thanks for reading.